Here To Help

People often get in touch asking for my advice.

This month Cathy got in touch:

Dear The Good Egg Network,

I have a big interview coming up for my dream job and need it to go well, any advice?

Thanks

Cathy

However, instead of me dishing out the advice, I thought it would be interesting if we enlisted the help of someone with a more unique take on things. And it just so happens that one of our Good Egg members (James T) is an anthropologist, who’s currently based in the Amazon rainforest working with the Kayonahua tribe, so I asked him if we might be able to get one of them involved. Thankfully, one man named Ayokawe (pictured) has agreed to be our agony uncle for the next few months, so I spoke to him last week (with James on translation duties).

G.E.N: Do you have any advice for Cathy, Ayokawe? What should she do about her big job interview?

A: What is a job interview?

G.E.N: It’s like a meeting you have with another person, to decide whether they want to hire you at their company.

A: She is being sold?

G.E.N: No, she - we have these things called companies, which are basically like groups of like-minded people who join together to provide services or products to others in exchange for money. Cathy would like to go and be a part of this new group of people, but how should she get them to accept her?

A: Does she have beans?

G.E.N: What sort of beans? Like edible beans?

A: No, beans.

G.E.N: I don’t know what sort of beans you’re talking about.

A: She should meet them with beans.

G.E.N: Yes but what species of bean are you - are you just saying Cathy should go in with a gift?

A: The beans are not a gift.

G.E.N: What are they for then?

A: The beans are for the parrots.

G.E.N: What parrots?

A: She is going in without parrots?

G.E.N: Why would she - look, Ayokawe, let's - let’s just say you wanted to join a neighbouring tribe, ok? For whatever reason, you wanted the head of this tribe to like you and take you in. What would you say to them to help your case?

A:  I would make them take my wife instead of me.

G.E.N: No, you want the job, or to be taken in by the tribe or whatever, your wife has nothing to do with any of this.

A: But my wife grew the beans.

G.E.N: Right, that’s - let’s just call it a day there, shall we? Try again next month.

Cathy, I hope that helps.

Dear The Good Egg Network,

I’m thinking of getting a pet dog but I’m not sure if it’s too much responsibility to take on, any advice? Thanks, Stephen.

G.E.N: Any advice for Stephen, Ayokawe? Do you have any pets yourself?

A: Yes. I have a fish. It is called Cho’ni.

G.E.N: Where do you keep it? I’m presuming you don’t have a fish tank in your-

A: I keep it in the river.

G.E.N: Right. So how do you keep it separated from all the other fish?

A: I don’t understand.

G.E.N: How do you know it’s always Cho’ni every day? How can you be sure it’s always the same fish?

A: Because it tastes the same.

G.E.N: So you eat this fish?

A: Yes. Every day.

G.E.N: Ok, but that’s not having a pet fish, that’s just going fishing. Do you not have like a dog, or cat, or monkey or anything that you-

A: In the Kayonahua tribe we have a saying, ‘He who rides the panther, must first catch the monkey.’

G.E.N: And what does that mean?

A: We don’t know.

G.E.N: So why did you bring it up?

A: You said monkey, and that’s the only saying I know about monkeys.

G.E.N: But I didn’t ask for a saying! I asked - Stephen just wants to know whether he should get a dog.

A: To help catch the fish?

G.E.N: Let’s try this again next month.

Stephen, I hope that helps.

Dear The Good Egg Network,

My wife really wants to go abroad on holiday, but I can’t stand flying, and get motion sickness on trains, cars and boats, what should I do? Thanks, Chris.

GEN: Any advice Ayokawe?

A: What is a holiday?

GEN: It’s when you take a little break from your regular life. And it often involving travelling to a different place. Have you ever done something like that?

A: I have been further down the river before, yes.

GEN: That’s sort of like a holiday then.

A: I was washed away while fishing on the bank near my village, and taken many miles down stream by the current.

GEN: Ok, well we probably wouldn’t call that a holiday.

A: But I very much enjoyed the return journey, and made the most of it, making camp every night on my own, under the stars.

GEN: Right, well that is more like a holiday. Maybe a spontaneous trip perhaps.

A: I was only five years old, so the jungle was all new to me.

GEN: I wouldn’t even call that a trip actually, that’s more of a disaster.

A: But now each year I go back and do the same journey.

GEN: Well that definitely is a holiday!

A: Because each year I am accidentally swept away while fishing, from exactly the same spot.

GEN: Nope, that’s just bad planning.

A: But my advice is to embrace difficulty and change, these are the things that shape our nature, telling us who we are now and what we can be in the future. And remember to swim close to the bank, it's shallower there.

GEN: Chris, I hope that helps.